SARAH CURNOLES BREAKUP COACH I was coaching a client the other day and she was choking back her tears as she kept talking to explain her situation. I asked her to pause telling the story, and to give some space to the emotion. I asked her to let herself cry. To let it happen without words or explanation or apology. Without needing to understand or fix it. And she let herself cry. She let it all out. It wasn’t pretty, like most good cries. You know the kind. The kind that has sobs where you...
13 days ago • 1 min read
SARAH CURNOLES BREAKUP COACH I recently left the apartment I moved into after my last significant relationship ended. I felt really sad when I made that decision. I actually cried about leaving that apartment. In many ways it felt like leaving that relationship that was nice, nothing was wrong, but it no longer was a fit for your life. A friend was confused by how sad I was about the move. And I get it. Why was I so upset about an apartment? This apartment was my sanctuary. I created the...
about 1 month ago • 1 min read
SARAH CURNOLES BREAKUP & DATING COACH I was ghosted recently and it really pissed me off. Who did this guy think he was? How rude to not even send a text to say “I’m not feeling it. Best wishes!” I don’t know why it became so commonplace to ghost people. From what I’m hearing from my community, there is a lot of ghosting going on right now. Maybe it’s because Valentine’s Day is right around the corner and some people don’t want to be in a relationship. If you find yourself obsessing over the...
about 1 month ago • 2 min read
SARAH CURNOLES BREAKUP COACH I used to think it was a “sign” when I constantly thought about my ex. I thought that meant that I really loved this person still and that we should be together. I thought if my mind was still stuck on him, then it must mean that our story wasn’t over. I have no idea where I came up with this. Maybe one too many rom coms and me romanticizing relationships. But this is a thought error. Just like if I had programmed my computer to run a program but I gave it bad...
about 2 months ago • 2 min read
SARAH CURNOLES BREAKUP COACH Ever have one of those weeks where you want someone to hold you in a tight hug and tell you everything is going to be ok? Been there. I released a new podcast episode yesterday that you might like. Check it out here. I wanted this to be one of my early episodes because I want this to be available forever and ever. I always want you to have a place to turn when you’re feeling like everything is falling apart and you don’t have any hope that things will be ok. This...
about 2 months ago • 1 min read
SARAH CURNOLES BREAKUP COACH I met a wonderful woman the other night. And she shared that she no longer believed love was possible for her because her last relationship hurt her so badly. Sitting next to her, I could feel the pain. And I could feel how much resentment she had for her ex and how much she was cutting herself off from her feelings. And I could see so much of myself in her. I had an ex who cheated on me. And what made it worse was that I had a feeling that something wasn't quite...
about 2 months ago • 2 min read
SARAH CURNOLES BREAKUP COACH I don’t like platitudes like when one door closes, a window opens. It can feel invalidating to the pain you’re going through. I know this all too well because I was recently in a door closed moment. All I could do was focus on those damn closed doors. It felt awful, lonely, and depressing. It was all I could think about. I was really stressed. If someone would have tried to tell me to look for the open window, I would have screamed in their face, "Don’t you...
2 months ago • 2 min read
SARAH CURNOLES BREAKUP & DATING COACH It takes courage to leave a relationship that doesn’t fit. It takes courage to start again. No matter what part of a breakup you’re in… courage will be required. By definition, courage is strength in the face of pain or grief. But I think movies have done us a disservice. They show these mega-moments, like the epic Braveheart scene where Mel Gibson summons everyone courage to go and fight. It makes courage look like it’s epic and it’s going to feel good...
2 months ago • 1 min read
SARAH CURNOLES BREAKUP & DATING COACH My client Carolyn was tired of being single, wearing oversized hoodies every day, hating her body and hating her home. She felt fed up with her own life. What she really longed for was a romantic partner. Like the romantic Hallmark movies she loved. Sure, they were overly simple, but she really craved was someone to love her for who she is. In a coaching session, she gave me a reason she couldn’t get rid of her old clothes, I asked her, “Do you think your...
3 months ago • 1 min read